The struggles and the strength

My first 48 hours days in Honduras have felt like a weeks.  I had the same feeling at the beginning of CHWC this summer.  It’s a crazy beautiful contradiction between things feeling very new and overwhelming, and feeling settled like I have done things so many times already. I have already started to settle into a routine and it feels amazing.  God has blessed me with quite a few struggles already, but he has also given me the strength and an awesome support system to make it through them.  I am slowly starting to learn to trust in Him always and give him every moment of joy and every moment of struggle. 

One major point of stress for me since I arrived has been my lost luggage.  My bag of clothing did NOT make it to Honduras on Sunday when I did.  The only clothing I had was the clothing on my back and two sweatshirts.  Being that the climate here is quite warm, the sweatshirts did not provide much use.  Luckily Jenny, Ashley, and Julie were there for me when things got tough, as well as the awesome parents at the school Bennett and Carlos.  Dealing with making arrangements in a language you are not fluent in is stressful.  Trying to adjust to a new way of life without everything your prepared to make your adjustment easier is even harder.  But as soon as I offered it all up to Him, telling Him that I understood if He felt I needed this detachment from my personal comforts & that He could have them, the glimmer of hope began to shine. 

I needed to trust Him.  And the reason everything was so stressful is because I was lacking trust in His plan.  When I felt that I needed to solve the problem, handle the situation, be strong… I broke down.  When I wanted to be independent, fear took over… I broke down.  When I struggled to be vulnerable, to ask others for help… I broke down.  Those breaks opened my mind and my heart and truly allowed me to begin my life here.  I have found God works through our struggles to strengthen our spirits.  For when we are struggling, we must surrender our will to His. 

Because of this hectic situation, I have learned how to be more resourceful, had the opportunity to experience Comayagua & Tegucigalpa, and practice my Spanish.  I was blessed today to finally receive my luggage and spend a day getting to know Bennett and Carlos.  God is so good and constantly working in my struggles to make me stronger.  Through this one, long, rough experience, he has given me hundreds of little blessings! I will joyfully suffer as long as the Lord is at my side.

Although I haven’t even met my students yet, I know this year is going to be full of many ups and downs.  I just pray that I can always see His hand at work and praise Him in each moment of each day.